I learned the hard way that I cannot always count on him to respect my feelings, even if I really respect him. Being a good person doesn’t guarantee that he’ll be a good person too.
“Despite all the disappointments, grudges, and my broken heart, I still have to admit that I wasn’t the one.” – @eurial
I only have control over myself and how I choose to be as a person. As for him, I can only choose to accept him or walk away.
And I promise… to walk away.
I’ve been stabbed in the back by those I needed most. I’ve been lied to by those I love. I’ve been fucked up by you, 2016.
So, 2017, promise me, I’ll move for myself.
Promise me, I’ll fall in love with myself. ‘Cause everyone else is selfish, naturally.
Promise me, I’ll stand up brightly for myself.
Promise me, I’ll work so hard and be so rich until he becomes my rival.
Promise me, sooner I’ll say, “Kau menengok ke belakang, melihat hal yang pernah begitu diperjuangkan, ternyata tak sepenting itu, sekarang. Lalu kau tersenyum tenang. Melanjutkan hari ini dan seterusnya dengan perasaan baru, bahwa apapun itu dulu, menjadikan sekarangmu.” – @FHMYMCHTR
Promise me, sooner I’ll just breathe and say, “Hi, Universe. It’s just a nightmare, not a bad life. I’m okay, I’m happy, I’m free in my authenticity, and I’m grateful for everything.”
Promise me, this is the last tears I gave to him and no more tears on 2017.
Promise me, I’ll have no time for love. ‘Cause everything I loved, destroyed me enough.
Promise me, I’ll go out, make a change, smile more, be excited, be fierce, be brave, do new things, throw away what I’ve been cluttering, unfollow negative people on social media, and show more gratitude.
Promise me, I’ll let go of what I can’t control.
Promise me, I’ll let go of [insert his full name here].
Promise me, he’ll search for me in another person.
And I promise,
He’ll never find me.
Bekasi, December, 31st 2016 at 4:24 PM (GMT +7)
Putri Nur Indah Pratiwi